I came home this week for spring break. When I walked into my room at my mom’s house I was faced, not with my familiar room of seven years, but a huge king-sized bed taking up most of my floor. I promptly burst into tears.
What did I learn? I am emotionally unstable.
Well not really. But I was upset. My mom said it was a surprise for me, since I haven’t had a new bed, let alone a new mattress, since I was in junior high. It’s a beautiful bed with new sheets and a new down comforter. But it is not really mine.
My mom said she wanted to surprise me and get me something nice and grown-up, but I knew the real motivation was my step-brother and his wife visiting later this week. They need somewhere to sleep and our pull-out couch disrupts functioning in the living room.
Sigh.
I know crying was a bit much. I was just overwhelmed by the change. I expected familiarity at home, and instead my whole space was invaded and turned around. There has been so much change in the last year that this was the last straw for me. My mom had not anticipated my reaction and said as much. I felt bad for worrying her, but I couldn’t help it.
Home is supposed to be constant. I am not quite sure how I feel about the bed. It is comfortable, to be sure, but it feels weird to have so much space. I don’t know. Just one more thing to get used to.
She really meant to get the bed for you, not for them. Do you really think she would have spent all that money on someone that is not her child? She even told me that if my room was bigger that she would have gotten me a bigger bed too. It may not be familiar, but it is definitely all yours.
I totally get it.